Beer & Burgers (not) | Sarah Hirsch


On the Fourth of July, the holiday of beer, burgers and blowing things up, I did what any cool 19 year old would do…I went to the movies with my parents. We watched other people blow things up in Spy with the brilliant Melissa McCarthy. (Seriously. That woman is magic. Go and buy a ticket right now. Go.)

I could have gone to a farm in the middle of nowhere (very American) with my twin brother and a bunch of people I didn’t know, but I honestly just didn’t feel like trying to learn everyone’s names.


Prior to the PG-13 rated fun, I did something even more badass. I made them dinner. My brother did too, but that doesn’t count because he’s not cool like you and I.

Here is what I (ugh, and the boy) made:

Recipe: Spicy Shrimp Kabobs

What you need:

Sauce - ¼ cup of olive oil, ¼ cup of lemon juice, ¼ cup of tomato sauce (or pureed tomatoes w/ oregano), 1 tsp of mustard (I used Dijon), 1 tbsp of paprika, 1 tbsp of chili powder, 1 tbsp of garlic powder, 1 tbsp of honey

Other stuff - 1 bag of cooked shrimp, 1 mango, 1 avocado, a medium/large pan, spoon or spatula, a patriotic demeanor, kabob sticks

First, leave the frozen shrimp in a container in the fridge to thaw over night.If you forget, like I did, DON’T PANIC. Just fill a pot with hot water, empty the bag and let those babies soak. While the shellfish are thawing, get your sauce ready! First mix the olive oil, lemon juice and tomato sauce, then add all your spicy powders, honey and mustard. If you want even less added sugar (as I did – no need to sugar crash before the cray-zay fun begins.), take a tomato, dice it and put that sucka in the food processor (a blender works too.) I added some oregano for more flavor.

Now for the other Supremes to your Diana Ross Shrimp – Mango and Avocado. Slice and dice those babies and put them on a plate for later. Check on your shrimp to see how they’re doin’. When they are thawed completely, shell them. Once that it done, it’s time for some heat! 

Get your pan on the stove, put some sauce up in there and put on medium to low heat. Put as many shrimp as you want and mix it all together. Keep the shrimp in there until you believe they’ve absorbed enough of the salt and spice and everything nice.

Whoo! Pat yourself on the back. You just did some grown up cooking type shit. Go you.

For the finale, either plate all the fixings in a decorative manner and allow the dinner guests (your loved ones) to make their own kabob. OR – Put them together your own damn self.

The finished product:


Now go make some kabobs and see a movie with your parental type figures. Whether they are a mother or father, aunt or uncle, brother, grandma, neighbor, friend – let them know you appreciate them. It’s incredible how happy my one decision this July 4th, made my parents.

What did you do for Independence Day?

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