Otessa & Liz.
Band practice has begun! But… the band’s not really practicing. The OJBG gang is surrounded by instruments, hanging on the telephone. But, band conductor Sarah is AWOL. She’s not picking up the phone, nor is she at home.
(90s aside — remember the pre-cell-phone-days when you had to call your besties at home and speak to their parents and probably had a phonebook’s worth of numbers dancing in your head.)
It’s all very mysterious considering this is the first rehearsal of Sarah’s brand new band. And has anyone seen Alex lately? Where the hell are these girls???
Let’s just insert some useful information here — y’know, on the record, for those of you late to the OJ train –
Before going AWOL, Sarah and Alex had both recently been dumped. Alex is broken hearted & flying solo. As for Sarah, the reason she’s not picking up is…slightly different. Sarah’s actually found temporary solace in Chloe’s warm bed– And obviously, there is no time to think about band practice when you’re getting your post-breakup-rebound-groove on! But Sarah’s been left flustered after being walked in by Adrian (uhhh Chloe’s fiance). So that’s where we find Sarah: half-dressed in an alley, shaking her head as she takes her steps down the walk of shame.
First she’s dumped via letter by her newly-gay boyfriend, Davis, who is in the “throes of a sexual awakening”. (Aside– I kind of want that as a bumper sticker.) Second, Alex seeks solace by flinging herself at the Hot New Band Member, Robin, AKA her ex-boyfriend’s bff. Yea, grreat idea, Alex. So well-adjusted of you. Anywhozzle, Robin ends up falling for Alex’s (soon to be ex) bff, Tamsin. All of this new-kid boat-rocking left some unpleasant emotional ripples in its wake. Third, Alex overhears Tamsin explaining to Sarah about the reason why their friendship has gone awry: “she’s upset because Robin didn’t want her and so she’s alone and unloved”. HARSH. After overhearing this, Alex’s rage inflames. She publicly lashes out at Tamsin and goes off the rails.
Cry me a river, Eeyore. Teen drama just doesn’t get any better.
That whole paragraph experience was like being transported back locker-side to my old high school hallway. In the best possible way.
After the band’s call to Sarah comes up empty handed, Tamsin decides to make an “olive-branch-extending” phone call to Alex. Tamsin and Libby try to tease Alex out of her little pity party and bring her back from the unknown. And it seems to be working! Alex is finally smiling and she takes their teasing in good swing… up until Robin decides to open his mouth and chime in to the call with a little mustachioed joke. Nope, not funny. As soon as his voice goes on the line, Alex’ face goes deadpan and that line goes dead. All it took was a little reminder of her jilted love life to bring her back to her Coma of Jealousy.
And that’s where we find Alex: still moping, still in bed. But, by the way the band sits in the last scene, you’re left with the lingering suspicion that this isn’t where we’ll find Alex next time… And I know from experience, you should never underestimate the rage of a jilted teen.
(Our recaps are also posted a week earlier over at CherryGrrl. So if you just can’t wait to read up on OJBG, you can can find Otessa’s recaps there first!)